According to the U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics in 2022 75% of #mothers were employed in families maintained by mothers. Among families maintained by #fathers, 85.7% of fathers were employed. 97.4% had at least one employed parent in 2022, and in 65% of these families, both parents were employed.
I want you to ask yourself this question, what skills am I really good at that I practice in my professional role that I can practice more for my parenting life?
When I started working and shortly after I became pregnant I was not ready for the journey ahead! How I survived 10 years later in the helping field career, being a very active single parent, starting a non-profit, and maintaining relationships is a testament to God's favor and my ability to P.U.S.H.
Parenting and having a career honestly have been some of the most anxious parts of this journey of single motherhood. Paying all the bills, making all the doctor appointments, taking off on all the sick days, rescheduling my entire life to attend to my girls, and plenty more that we would be here all day listing it out. I have been good at keeping a job so I would like to take a moment and discuss how I balance and see transferrable skills that are practical in my parenting life.
Transferrable Skill #1: Effective Communication
(Just an FYI)
Effective communication is the process of exchanging information in a way that the sender and receiver understand the message as intended.
(OpenAI. (2024). ChatGPTÂ (3.5) [Large language model]. https://chat.openai.com)
I'll start with honesty in the way I communicate at work and the way I communicate at home in "high-stress" moments, I am not an effective communicator. However, when I am not I use skills like clear and calm instructions. I have found this to be helpful especially when dealing with impulsive behaviors and situations that can emotionally escalate.
When I can talk to the girls in a manner that is calm and clear when they are dealing with a difficult situation, I notice how they soothe as they see me NOT over-reacting. I used to do this a lot and it caused me more of a headache than the situation I was hoping to handle. So, yeah be clear and calm when speaking, and if that doesn't work? Just simply keep your cool just like at work because you still have to deal with your live-in co-workers (kids) after hours and the next day, over and over and over again.
Try these out too!
Active Listening
Empathy and Understanding
Openness and Honesty
Transferable Skill #2: Building Relationships
One of the key things I emphasize in the workplace settings I engage in, especially with my girls, is building relationships. To be honest, I need to take some time to acknowledge the growth I have made in this area. I used to try to be the reason for anyone and everyone to laugh or smile, including my daughters.
However, the way I build relationships now is different in terms of how respect is exchanged. I used to think that everyone deserves respect, but that is not the case, especially if they do not respect who you are in their life.
So, at home, I make sure that my daughters understand the dynamic of our relationship. I also ensure that they know I value our relationship and understand them inside and out. Finally, I remind them of the importance of how they treat our relationship and respect my role in their life, just like I do for their role in my life.
Transferable Skill #3: Attention to detail
Have you ever taken a moment to observe your children as they converse, play, or simply go about their daily activities at home? If you haven't tried it yet, you'll be amazed at the small details you can learn about your child that are essential to building a strong relationship with them both now and in the future, as they grow into adulthood.
It is important to bond with your child and provide them with experiences that help them grow into their authentic selves. Sometimes this makes me sound or look like a perfectionist. However, it is just me making sure I am in tune with my girl's likes and dislikes to create opportunities for them to feel and be successful. (You welcome ChloKay! )
Transferable Skill #4: Urgency vs. Importance (Priorities)
Throughout my 10-year career while being a single mother, becoming a homeowner, non-profit founder, friendships, and an employee, I have learned to effectively prioritize tasks based on importance and urgency.
It has taken some trial and error on many levels but I'm still striving for the best possible life I desire, to ensure my daughters understand the difference between urgency and importance.
I want to give my children a childhood they do not have to recover from!
For me to achieve my parenting goals, I prioritize important tasks and handle urgent matters as they arise (Always right!). If you knew about my aspirations, you might wonder how I plan to accomplish them. The truth is, if something is important to me, I make sure to make time for it in my schedule and kid's schedule. But, to be honest, if it doesn't align with my parenting responsibilities or kid's interest it's probably not for me/us.
What Transferable skills have you developed since becoming a parent, leave a comment below and share!
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